Feb 6, 2024
I woke up scared and angry. Frustrated and foul mouthed. I sat for a little while. I watched the breath. I ascended up, up and away! I felt much better.
I played around with my ‘Why Can’t I Stop’ song. I was trying to finish the fucking thing.
I went out and got photos and videos. I explored a river. The water calmed me and talked to me like an old shishka.
I felt so cool and powerful. I even got horny and high! I started rambling away like a madman. I listened to artists fart from their mouths. It made me really bored.
That side of me is dark. But it has many rivets and divots. I just hope to grow and proceed into the next dream. The next one will be much more colourful.
It feels like a nursery rhyme. Much more swirling. Like clouds from space! Like the eyes of an old cat!
I came home. I drank coffee and really let loose. My pants burst wide open. My stomach rolled to the floor.
Later on I felt low. I talked and talked with a man. I felt as though I had sold out. I acted in a way that isn’t me. I felt weak. I was a ‘yes yodeler’. A ‘person pleasurer’.
Fuck! I felt so ashamed. I didn’t know how to end the fucking conversation. I just stood there wobbling around on my heels! I sipped water like a fake fool.
It’s ok. I’m just a babe in heat. I’m growing! I’m like a tiny seed.
I CAN DO THIS!!! I’M STRONG LIKE OX!