Changing My Churros

  Feb 29, 2024

I’m at home. It’s 10:12 pm. I had work today. It was fine. I only worked like 3 hours. Nate is back so it’s a lot more laid back. I was working mostly with George before. That was painful. 

I went to the meditation place across the street today. It was my first time going. It was nice. I still can’t believe it’s right across the street. I’ll continue going. It’s nice to have something so close. 

Last night was rough. My roommate Josh plays videos games for most of the night. He’s usually playing online with people, and so I can hear him talking. He’s in the room below me and the sound goes right through the floor. I started playing rain sounds on my phone a few nights ago. That really helped. 

Last night he kept slamming the door to his room. It kept waking me up. Every time I was drifting off to sleep I’d suddenly wake up again. It was really bad. I started getting so angry. I started thinking that I’d search for other houses in the morning. 

I finally fell asleep. I had these amazing dreams of resolving the issue in a really mature and successful way. I was talking to Josh in the dream and everything was good. I also had the idea that I could just text the group chat. The idea of actually saying something polite seemed possible. That had seemed so difficult when I was lying awake in bed. I don’t know why. 

I was really grateful for those dreams. I woke up feeling really empowered and optimistic. I texted a message to the group chat on my way to work. He sent a really nice reply apologizing and saying that he’d try to be more quiet. I couldn’t believe it! 

Similar situations had turned bad the last couple times. One was in the hostel when I asked the guy to turn down the brightness on his screen. The other time was with Carly in Melbourne.

On Tuesday I went to meet Anita for the volunteering work. I basically helped some people in wheelchairs play bingo. It was nice. The staff were very friendly. The place had a nice vibe. Anita said they had been looking for someone to play guitar. I told her that I played, and that I would love to play music for the patients. It was perfect! I’ve wanted to do something like that for years. 

On Monday I’m meeting her at a different building. That’s where I’ll meet the staff who need the musician. I’m hoping that I can book one day a week off of work. I’ll play music at the centre, and then after wards I can go to one of the open-mics. There’s only a couple in Christchurch and one of them is close to where the patient carer centre is.

Moon Drumming

  Feb 25, 2024

No work today. I worked the last 6 days. I haven’t heard back from any other jobs. I hope something changes.

I’m really bored. I feel so directionless. I don’t know what to do.

 I can make music, but then I feel like I’m wasting time by not trying to find a new job. I also feel like I’m supposed to be researching this ESL stuff.

I guess I can just dedicate an hour a day to doing job stuff, an hour a day to doing blog stuff, and an hour a day to music stuff. That’s actually pretty good.

Douma left for France today. We hung out twice over the last few days. 

Yesterday she texted me about an event at the beach. It was a drumming circle for the full moon. She was going with some travellers that she was staying with.

 I went along. Douma and I took the bus together. We walked around for a bit. The sky was amazing. 

Her friends arrived and we found the drummers. At first I wasn’t really interested. But then I got a tambourine and I had a lot of fun. There were tons of people. Many of them were dancing.

 It was pretty cloudy but the moon made an appearance for a little while. It was a nice way to spend my last day with Douma. 

She told me she had been tempted to cancel her flight. She was thinking of hitchhiking to go visit Pierre. He’s volunteering at a music festival for a few days. She decided it probably wasn’t a good idea. 

I noticed that she had changed her phone wallpaper to a photo of the two of them. It must feel weird for her to be going home. Especially because her and Pierre got together at the end of her trip. 

I’ve been thinking about Toronto quite a bit. I’ve been thinking about how weird it would feel to be home. I’m sure after a week it would feel normal again.

 I miss the Beaches, though. It’s such a nice neighbourhood.  

The albatross circled his prey. He waited until just the right moment. Then he shot down like a meteor. He grabbed the baby goose right out of my hands. I tried to fight the bird. I was no match. The thief took my baby away.

The planet was shaking. The times were changing. Everyone knew it. I was keenly aware, myself.

I thought about old memories of card games with friends. We’d tried our best to have fun. We really wanted to make great memories. But everyone got pregnant, as they always do. 

Our outfits became less trendy. The beer disappeared behind rows of breast pumps. The power tools and bikes were melted down for sheet metal. Everything changed. Love turns to little larvae lads. 

Friends Again

  Feb 22, 2024

I had work again today. I’ve been working every day. It’s good for my bank account. I don’t like the job, though! 

I went to the Prince Isaac Theatre yesterday after work. I talked to a lady behind the desk and she said to come in the morning. That’s when the manager would be there.

 I went this morning and gave him my resume. He said he might email me next week. He was giving a bunch of new employees a tour of the place when I arrived. I guess they just hired a bunch of new people.

I need to look into getting my alcohol license in case I get a call from one of these theatres. 

I don’t want to keep working at the souvlaki place! 

Douma and Pierre were here yesterday. We hung out after I finished work. 

We walked around for a little bit. We went to the park by my place. We lay on the grass and played guitar. 

That was their last day together. Both of their energy was sorta off. I think they were both sad. 

Pierre left this morning for a music festival. Douma is in town for a couple more days. She flies back to France on Sunday. I wonder if anything will continue between them. 

I’m allowed to run upside down. Anything is allowed when I’m asleep.

Papa from space landed on the lawn. He stood there for a little while. 

“Wake up!” He screamed towards the window. 

I jumped out of bed. I grabbed my boots and my comb. I ran down the stairs like my feet were on fire. I opened the front door.
There was Space Papa! He was glowing on the grass.

“Welcome to my presence,” he whispered. 
“You’re back!” I cheered.

“I never left,” he replied. “I’ve always been under your bed. I’ve always been humming.”

“I know! I never lost faith!” I ran out onto the grass and kissed my Space Papa’s feet. My lips tingled. I felt ancient wisdom enter through the crown of my head.

“Let’s eat,” he whispered. “Let’s have an early breakfast.”

I stood slowly, brushing tears from my eyes. I nodded and took my Space Papa’s hand. We floated silently down the street.

A Christmas Massacre

  Feb 20, 2024

The Christmas lights hung from the ceiling with care. The cats of the town swayed back and forth with sparkles in their eyes. They were in awe! 

    Santa arrived and floated down the chimney. He found his sister waiting for him next to the couch.“Goode evening, Chris!” Laughed the sister.

    Santa jumped in freight. He fell forewords. He got his head stuck up a cat’s ass.

    “My dear brother! I’m sorry!” Screamed the sister. She ran over and tried to help.
“I can’t breath! I’m running out of air!” Screamed Santa, his voice muffled and frightened.
There were footsteps from upstairs. Someone was awake! 
“We need to hide!” Whispered the sister. “The children are coming!”

    Santa didn’t hear her over his screams. He began running around the room. He was crashing into furniture as he desperately tried to free himself. The cat shrieked in pain.
“Release me from these shackles!” Screamed Santa. 

The footsteps were getting closer. The sister decided to save herself. She crept out the back door and ran into the woods.

The children descended the stairs and saw a truly ugly sight. They were emotionally ruined. 
The house was later demolished and a memorial was erected.